Posted by: Tom Duch | February 12, 2010

Olympic Duchisms

The very popular Duchisms are back just in time for the winter Olympics in Vancouver. Team USA got off to a hot start already as some of the ladies shed some clothing in the new Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue. The US looks to build on a second place medal count from four years ago in Turin, and look to do it with some great skiers and snowboarders led by the “Flying Tomatoe” Shaun White and the games biggest cover girl so far, Lindsay Vonn.

Here is a list of the best Duchisms from the pool of Team USA athletes:

Men’s Hockey

David “BACKES to the future”

“DUSTIN the wind” Brown

Patrick KANE- cue the fire and theme song

Phil “sand KESSEL”

Zach “PARISE does it”

Jonathan “be nimble Jonathan be QUICK” Jonathan jumped over a defender’s stick

Tim Thomas- when he gets a shutout (a 0 or a bagel as they call it)- “THOMAS makes bagels”

Women’s Hockey

Julie “CHU talkin’ to me”

Meghan “hacksaw Jim DUGGAN” HOOOOOO!!

Hilary “oh what a KNIGHT”

Gigi “MARVIN gardens”- I’ll buy it

Erika “I fought the LAWLER and the LAWLER won”- for those Clash faithful

Jessie “you VETTER you VETTER you bet”- any Who fans out there?

Snowboarding

Hanah “TETER totter”

Scotty “LAGO my Eggo”

Shaun White- Mr. White, with the snowboard, on the halfpipe (Clue reference, come on you’re killing me here)

Skiiing

Sho Kashima- SHO me the money!/ Money, KASHIMA, hoes/ Yogi and the Aflac duck might say, “they give you KASHIMA, which is just as good as money/ Randy Moss might like, “straight KASHIMA homey”

Lindsay “bet you can’t have just VONN”- gold medal that is

Ice Dancing

Tanith “You can ring my BELBIN” and her partner, Ben “AGOSTO save some room for later”

Standing at 5 feet, the following ladies are tied for the title of shortest Olympian for team USA

Caydee DENNEY- anything regarding a Grand Slam would be appropriate here

Laura “SPECTOR gadget”- doo doo doo doo doo dooooo

Amanda “EVORA little thing you do is magic”

Michelle “ROARK: the other white meat”

Best of the Rest:

Dan “happy happy JOYE joy”

Mike “ice cream KOHN”- too easy, sorry I had to

Steve “know when to HOLCOMB, know when to fold um”

“I get a KIKKAN out of you” Randall

Bill “let me see that Demong”- Sisqo, thong song, anyone…come on these names are straight KASHIMA

Interesting Facts- all jokes aside

Angela Ruggiero- appeared on Apprentice in 2007, only to be fired after 10 episodes by the Donald. Trump later offered her a job off the air, but she turned it down to play hockey.

Lowell Bailey- the biathlete is also a bi-musician. Lowell plays the guitar and mandolin. Guitar, mandolin, and an Olympic athlete, move over Paul McCartney.

More to come….

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Responses

  1. How could I forget the controversial, “Apple pie a la BODE” Miller


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